magistrate: Why did you rob the same shop second time.
thief: Your honour ,i saw board in the shop which said 'thank you visit again'.
son: Father, someone has come asking for a donation for a swimming pool.
father: Give then a bucket of water
Church minister: Do you say a little prayer before you sit down to eat your meals?
Little boy: Thereís no need for that, my mumís a great cook!
A guide was showing an old lady round a zoo.
"Here we have a native of Australia," he said, taking her to the kangaroo's cage.
"Goodness," the old lady replied in shock. "My grand-daughter's married one of those!"
Rina: How many children have you got?
Ameena: Two boys and a girl.
Rina: That's three altogether.
Ameena: No - one at a time!
Customer: Do you call this a full meal? You served me twice as much yesterday.
Waitress: Where did you sit yesterday?
Customer: By the window.
Waitress: Oh, that's why. We do that for advertising purposes - it gives people passing by the impression that this is a good restaurant!
Gappu: Ha, ha!
Nippi: What's so funny?
Gappu: Well, I was thinking ...
Nippi: Yes, you're right - that is funny!
Ronit: Do you want to come to a party tonight?
Rajat: I can't. I'm going to see Romeo and Juliet.
Ronit: Well, bring them along as well!
Monica: Has your sister had her baby yet?
Ruchika: Yes, she sent me an e-mail, but she didn't say whether it was a boy or a girl, so I don't know whether I'm an aunt or an uncle!